Making Holiday Gatherings Comfortable for Loved Ones with Dementia
The joyful spirit of the holiday season can sometimes feel overshadowed by the challenges faced by families with loved ones living with dementia. As Thanksgiving and other holidays approach, it's essential to prepare effectively so that both caregivers and the individual with dementia experience meaningful and enjoyable gatherings. The American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA) offers valuable strategies to enhance communication and connection during these special times.
Understanding Dementia and Its Impact
Dementia significantly affects how individuals communicate and process information. Though many may recognize the common memory issues associated with dementia, the disorder also complicates conversation and interaction in various ways:
- - Difficulty in choosing the right words
- - Mixing up words or phrases
- - Losing their train of thought
- - Trouble following conversations or staying on topic
- - Misunderstanding spoken words
Bernadette Mayfield-Clarke, PhD, CCC-SLP and current ASHA President, emphasizes, "Communication is key to connecting with others, especially during the holidays. Taking time to adapt your communication approach can lead to richer interactions with your loved ones."
Tips for Care Partners
Care partners shoulder immense responsibility, particularly during the bustling holiday season. Here are some practical steps to create a harmonious atmosphere:
1. Set Visitor Expectations
Inform guests about what changes they might notice in their loved one due to dementia. Explain that these changes are not a reflection of personal relationships but an impact of the disease, fostering patience and understanding among visitors.
2. Prepare Individuals with Dementia
Brief the person with dementia about who will be visiting well in advance. Consider showing them pictures of guests paired with names to jog their memory. Crafting a straightforward schedule can also help them feel more secure about what to expect.
3. Maintain Routines
Although consistency in routines might be challenging, strive for regular patterns in daily activities to minimize confusion and frustration for the person with dementia.
4. Limit Overstimulation
Large crowds and noisy settings can be daunting. Reduce background noise and ensure there's ample space for everyone, including individuals with dementia.
5. Seek Professional Support
Don’t hesitate to consult the care team, including speech-language pathologists or social workers. Numerous resources are available, such as the National Caregiver Help Desk and local health agencies.
Guidance for Extended Family and Friends
Relatives and friends can ease the burden on caregivers by being flexible and supportive. Instead of asking, “What can I do to help?”, consider offering specific assistance, such as running errands or taking on cooking duties.
Strategies for Meaningful Interaction
To interact effectively with a loved one suffering from dementia, extended family and friends should consider the following strategies:
- - Calm Conversations: Approach the person directly and use their name. Maintaining a warm, friendly tone can facilitate more open dialogue.
- - Simplify Communication: Speak clearly and slowly, using simple sentences and focusing on one concept at a time.
- - Respect Adult Status: Treat the individual as an adult rather than adopting a condescending tone.
- - Allow Processing Time: Give them extra time to respond, pausing patiently as they gather their thoughts.
- - Live in Their Reality: Connect based on their perspective, encouraging conversation about their world without correcting misconceptions.
- - Share Instead of Quizzing: Avoid questions that prompt recall of specific memories. Instead, share stories or photographs that resonate with them, coupled with light commentary.
- - Appeal to the Senses: Use familiar music and favorite holiday foods to invoke fond memories and spark enjoyment.
- - Provide Choices: Rather than open-ended questions, present them with specific options (e.g., “Would you like stuffing or mashed potatoes?”).
- - Nonverbal Communication: Engage with them at eye level, maintain eye contact, and smile often to convey warmth.
- - Handle Repetitions Gracefully: If they repeat themselves, gently redirect them to new topics rather than expressing frustration.
Preparing Children for Changes
Explaining dementia to children can help ease discomfort or confusion. Here are ways to facilitate this:
- - Simple Explanations: Use age-appropriate language to describe the condition. For instance, explain that “Grandpa’s brain works differently now, but he still loves us.”
- - Model Interaction: Demonstrate how they can greet and interact with their loved one positively and patiently.
- - Practice Phrases: Encourage kids to use simple introductions or reassurances to help bridge gaps in understanding.
- - Anticipate Behavior Changes: Discuss what children might observe, emphasizing that the affected individual is not behaving that way intentionally.
- - Suggest Fun Activities: Engage in easy, interactive methods to connect, like looking through family pictures or listening to music.
- - Acknowledge Emotions: Create space for children to express feelings like sadness or confusion. Encourage them to take breaks when needed.
If questions or concerns persist, connecting with a speech-language pathologist can provide crucial support. To locate resources in your area, visit ASHA’s professional directory at
ASHA ProFind.
About ASHA
The American Speech-Language-Hearing Association (ASHA) is a leading professional body representing over 240,000 members involved in audiology and speech-language pathology. Their mission includes promoting effective communication across all individuals, especially those facing challenges in these areas. Visit
www.asha.org for more information.